urgh!!

Wow!!!my cousin is getting married. She sent me the email and all I could get out was WOW!!! Im really really happy for her. That’s just amazing!!! Anyway, back to my never ending life of events. So I just found out that my really really really good friend, like this is a girl iv cried with countless times. In high school we sat next to each other and when our form tutor moved us, we were in tears. Anyway, I told her how im planning to move uni’s and country’s and she was like…oh,ok. And iv been struggling to get any info, basically groping in the dark, and im getting there, out of nothing else but sheer determination! Turns out that she knows someone in the country that im going to. She could have made my life so much easier, I don’t know why she does some things. I chose to come to the uk and work a little before I go, be a little independent, get some money for myself before I go to uni. I really hated italy, and when I tell her, she goes…oh, are you sure you want to move, I mean, a whole year and other comments that I shant write down here. Basically making it seem like im jumping all over the place, while she’s all settled with a perfect life, which is far from, but anyway. So im just sick of it! Im tired of people pretending, im sick of acting dumb like I don’t know what’s going on, just coz I couldn’t be bothered to get involved. Then I think about all the other people, I hadnt been in the uk a full week and one of my friends who lives here calls me up. Apart from my parents and my boyfriend, nobody had my number. And this friend just always keeps tabs. He’ll ask how im getting on, how im getting on with my uni plans, how’s work, such things. I havent cried with him, don’t share any of my deepest secrets with him, yet I still feel I could tell him anything. I have to think twice before I tell this other friend things coz I can bet my life, she’ll spit out some coment that just makes you feel like crap and about oh, 2 inches off the ground! It really bothers me. Anyway, that’s my rant for the day!